he is faithful // a story of how I have gotten this far

Hey y’all!

To start off, this week has been really good. I’m settling into the flow of summer, and honestly, it’s marvelous. I love summer for this.

It’s a chance to create my own schedule and get things that I want/need to get done, done.

It has also been a time for me to breathe and spend more time with my Abba (btw it means “father” and is used by both Jesus and Paul in the New Testament. It shows a connection/intimacy with Him and I really like using it). He’s been showing me lots of cool things lately, but before I sat down to write this, He asked a special favor.

Normally, I’ll sit down and write something that has been on my mind from the week or whatever else I feel like I’m supposed to write.

This time, He gently whispered, “Write about me.”

And I was like, “Sure, but there is a loooot of gray area in ‘write about me’. What do you want me to write?”

And although He didn’t specifically say what it was, my mind went to the fact that this weekend is the one year anniversary of our move to the South. Immediately, I knew that it was this. I was supposed to write about how God orchestrated our move to Tennessee.

Funny how those things happen. The whole exchange was a matter of seconds. But within those seconds, I had a plan for what I was to do.

Similarly, that same thing happened with the move.

Let me be perfectly honest with you guys, I am not one who likes change or different patterns. I wanted lightning to come hit me when someone asked if I wanted to join their table, for crying out loud. It is even worse when it comes to moving.

Moving from California to Pennsylvania was, at least in my opinion, the worst move. Everything was completely new. And I did not want to change anything from the way it was. (not to mention leaving my family and friends I had known since forever behind… that sucked.)

There were several moves in Pennsylvania, luckily none of them changed anything we were already involved in drastically. I still had the same friends and I still saw them regularly. Eh. Nothing changed. Ooh actually that’s a point I’ll make later.

The move from Pennsylvania to Tennessee was the best one. Not just because it went smoothly from a logistic standpoint; it truly was the best move. I think this is because it felt like we were coming home. We already knew a lot of people down there and it was like going back to your house after a long day at school.

I find this funny sometimes because how much changed in between? We were just moving, so why were they all so different? I’ve asked the Lord this a lot, and every time He answers, “Because you were different with each one.”

Oof. Leave it to Jesus to hit you with some truth. I love it.

And it’s true! I moved to PA when I was ten (yikes), moved to a new house there at eleven and thirteen, and then moved to TN when I was fifteen. Now as a sixteen year old who is wearing excellent hindsight Jesus goggles, I can look back quite practically and say “uh yeah I should have been different with each move, because look at those ages…”

Gotta tell you, I was probably a bit of a handful in those early teen years. It was a lot to be moving around all the time. I didn’t ask for it. In fact, I asked specifically for it NOT to happen when I first heard about it.

But God is GRACIOUS.

Bold, highlight, underline. He is! He just is, and it is insane to think about sometimes.

I have learned so much and grown even more over these five years. When I first moved to PA, I was involved in worship ministry stuff for kiddos at my old church and taking piano lessons the entire time, but it never clicked until I was needed to step into a higher position of responsibility. Now, looking back on it, it was clearly preparation for the BIGGER things I’m doing now!

I have been growing in prayer and learning about the spiritual realities we live in, and it has changed me a whole lot. When I moved to PA, I was deathly afraid to even pray out loud. While sometimes I still hesitate, I served on the weekend prayer time on Sunday. This has been the biggest kicker moving down to Tennessee. I am being involved in a community of people who care about these things and it is beautiful. I am learning so much.

All of this would never have happened if I hadn’t quit my struggling and fighting with God over the things that I had (if you think about it) no say in. I was ten, what was I going to do about moving? Nothing.

It was a chance to learn that God’s ways are higher, even when I don’t believe it.

I don’t trust my ways, I’m trading in my faults. I lay down everything cause You’re all that I want. I’ve landed on my knees, this is the cup You have for me, and even when it don’t make sense, I’m gonna let Your Spirit lead.

Spirit Lead Me, Influence Music

God is gracious and He is faithful, even when we don’t think so. Our distrust in Him doesn’t change the fact. He is real, He loves us unconditionally, and He wants the best for us.

Even when it doesn’t make sense, I’m gonna let Your Spirit lead.

Now go forth, mis amigos and amigas, and smile. Your day is just beginning. Make the best of it. Don’t procrastinate. Work hard. Make me proud. 🙂

Love you all,

Madeleine 

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How has God been working in your life lately? Let me know in the comments! I’d love to chat with y’all! ❤